Who doesn't want to party all the time?

I was going to post the original, but this version perfectly illustrates everything that is absolutely horrendous (and wonderful) about the Eddie Murphy/Rick James video. At least it's still a great hit. Enjoy!



Artist: Sharam
Title: P.A.T.T. (Party All The Time)

Getting deep in some serious POOP!

A recent conversation about a friend's digestive tract led to this. BTW: This is not for the faint at heart or anyone who doesn't have a fourth grade sense of humor.

@ameena1229: they don't know. I assume something is paralyzed its not uncommon to have a paralytic bowel or intestine, could be my pancreas isn't releasing digestive enzymes. who knows

Me: damn pancreas

@ameena1229: the meds they have me is the stuff they give old people essentially when their body starts shutting down lol

Me: awwwww. i'm wikiing constipation lol. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Constipation. i love the poop diagram. like who grows up and says i want to be a Poopologyst and study poop all day?

@ameena1229: LOL I dunno but I think that's awesome

Me: LOL i have type 3 and 4 poop. usually type 4 after a fiber one bar. lol

@ameena1229: LOL i have 1.

Me: awww well that's better than sloppy feces i mean who the heck wants to have a drippy anus?

@ameena1229: LOL HAHAHAHAHAHAHA sloppy? omg never gonna eat a sloppy joe again

Me: yeah when it's all wet and sloppy the kind that's so bad you get splash back. you know that's why they invented the toilet with the water thing that sprays your ass

@ameena1229: a bidet. I have one. I love it. LOL. its great to ensure freshness

Me: oh god i think I'll leave it up to toilet paper lol

@ameena1229: what its like a bath

Me: my bum might get a little self conscious. it would seem like a carwash just awkward

@ameena1229: HAHA yeah it is a bit like a car wash

Me: lol... do they give you the triple coat under carriage spray?

@ameena1229: lol no but you can have hot or cold water

Me: LMAO. i prefer luke warm. actually scratch that... it better be spring water at room temperature

@ameena1229: omg the people around me must think I'm nuts

Me: from the Tuscan alps

@ameena1229: I'm like seriously laughing and loud. this entire time like what 15 minutes

Me: they're all like... look at the mental lady who keeps giggling to herself, she must be high

@ameena1229: stop it I need to regroup. omg everyone in class thinks I do drugs. I don't get that

Me: you're from CA

@ameena1229: I've never done a drug ever

Me: they think everybody in CA smokes pot. the middle of America doesn't get it. they've all been living in their asses.

Kittens.... Inspired By.... Kittens

I was running on the treadmill the other day and nearly fell off from laughing so hard, when I saw this on The Soup. I have to give props to @ameena1229 for reposting this on Facebook.




The best line definately has to be:
Gray cat: "I'm your mom."
White cat: "No she's not."

What did you say?

In case you were looking for more crap to buy or just want to look stupid - check out the Loud 'N Clear. No need to admit you're losing your hearing, when you can buy one of these baby's (and look high tech at the same time).

Un-Stimulating

I'm a bit of a cynic. I'll admit it. I don't trust most things to begin with, and now with this new economic plan that is out, I have one question for you Obama-maniacs.

How the hell is $13 dollars a week going to stimulate our economy? SERIOUSLY!

I hate to bring up politics, because there is nothing worse than getting into a pissing match about your personal political or religious beliefs. We are all entitled to our opinions, I get it... freedom of speech, first amendment, yada yada yada.

But this new plan that is going to put future generations into trillions of dollars of debt CAN NOT be realistically effective. When three congress members admit to not reading all 1300 pages of the package, and then vote YES on the bill, is that really looking out for what is in the best interest of the people? Our country can not continue to run on auto-pilot.

I want my money back. I love me some Jesus. And yes.... I am a Republican. BITE ME!

Lonely Hearts Club

I know every year on Valentine's Day there is someone out there who feels bad because they didn't get a card. I dedicate this post especially to you!

HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY!

Happy Birthday....

Mom today you would have been 60 years old. Forever in my eyes you will be the beautiful mother who left us before her time. I miss you.

25 Random Things About Me

Rules: Once you've been tagged, you are supposed to write a note with 25 random things, facts, habits, or goals about you. At the end, choose 25 people to be tagged. You have to tag the person who tagged you. If I tagged you, it's because I want to know more about you.

To do this, go to “Notes” under tabs on your Profile home page, click New Note, copy/paste these instructions in the body of the note, type your 25 random things, tag 25 people (in the upper right hand corner of the note, where it says "Tag People") then click Publish.

1. I have the worst stomach ache ever from eating too many carbs today. I'm serious... it all started with left over spanish rice, then the PB& J sandwich that led into linguine with clam sauce, a little bit of left over banana pudding from Friday night (thanks Adrienne) and some how I thought it would be a good idea to drink a tall glass of orange juice about an hour ago. I think my stomach is about to explode.

2. I love to blog but am always afraid I'll say the wrong thing and lose my job one day. You don't know how many things I have deleted merely minutes after writing them. Fearful are we?

3. I studied 4 years of Japanese in high school and 2 years in college, but I can only remember how to introduce myself and say thank you.

4. I'm only doing this to kill time because I'm still not sleepy.

5. I usually have a really hard time falling asleep at night and read Wikipedia entries on my iTouch while laying in bed (until 1 o'clock in the morning).

6. Sadly I am fascinated by the British monarchy.

7. If radio paid as much as I make now in online ad sales, I would quit my job tomorrow and go back on air. DON'T TELL MY BOSS!

8. I had my license suspended for a year when I was 19 for driving "intoxicated". NOTE: I was below the legal .08 limit, but there is this stupid zero tolerance law for minors in California. Thank god I'm not 19 anymore...

9. Driving under the influence was a common occurrence in my teen years... up until I had my license suspended. Oh don't act like you never did it! You and your holier than thou bullshit.

10. A second ago I felt guilty for cursing in public (on the internet). Somehow I still have a thing about using swear words outside of my immediate circle of friends.

11. At some point in life I would like to figure out what I was destined for. I keep feeling like I haven't achieved my purpose for being here. Come on... god did not put me here so I could sell internet advertising all my life.

12. I have a serious case of ADD, but I've never told my psychiatrist because I don't want him to judge me. Go figure....

13. The worst enemy I could possibly ever have is myself. You should hear the conversations I have with myself from time to time. Talk about being brutal.

14. I do my best thinking in the shower.

15. Classical music is the shit!

16. Small babies scare me and I'd much rather pop out a two year old when the time comes.

17. My salary is double what I made about 4 years ago.

18. I just felt like rubbing that in a little because... YES I AM A BAD ASS!

19. Every now and then I have to laugh at myself because if I can't laugh at me, then you will, and we'll all just feel bad and regret it later. ASSHOLE!

20. As much as I love celebrity gossip and what not, I really really really really really hate pop culture. You have no clue how much MTV has dumbed down America.

21. No I did not vote for Obama. Give it 6 months and you'll see why. BTW: How's that stimulus package coming along?

22. This one is going to sound a bit morbid, but I've decided I want to die first in my relationship. I already called dibs and I better not be the last one still alive when everyone else is warm in their coffins.

23. Part two: I really would much rather not be buried in a casket. There is something about being stuck in the ground for the rest of eternity that just doesn't sound very pleasant. Will someone promise to spread my ashes in a Redwood forest or something? I'd say just dump me in the ocean, but there's already too much garbage in there and we've done enough damage in our lifetime as it is. BTW: Dennis I'm still sending some of my ashes to you in a ziplock, so we can be closer.

24. My cell phone is perpetually on silent. I will never EVER turn on the ringer. EVER... so if I miss your call at any point in time, now you know why. Side note: I get a weird sense when I know someone is about to call me. So if I answer your call it's because I had a "feeling" you were about to hit me up. Yeah a little creepy... I know.

25. There will never be a better burrito than the one's made at El Charrito in Salinas (preferably the "burrito de lengua" - that's tongue burrito for you non-native speakers). YUMMMMM!

Make A Difference!

With the current state of the economy, the last thing we tend to think about is lending more money. It's unfortunate because those who need it most, are affected on a greater level when financial assistance can't be provided. I've personally become involved in a small movement across the globe called micro-lending.

There are organizations in third world countries which establish a small lending system (and by small I'm talking like $200 dollars) to the most impoverished people on the planet. The couple of dollars you contribute as a loan are 99.999% of the time repaid, and you make a tremendous impact on the life of a person who might not have had the opportunity to help themselves without your support. You would be surprised by what $25 dollars can do to help alleviate poverty. Click the image below to learn more.